Fare Thee Well

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Good morning, Sacramento, for one last time.

I’m about to clean up Denato’s bedroom, which I’ve graciously borrowed for the past few weeks while he’s been in Argentina. Thank you Denato. You may never know how glad I am that I wasn’t stuck in the basement this whole time. I’ll leave it like I found it. I’ll even take out the trash.

Good morning, Sacramento. It’s gonna be a sunny 66 degrees today. Not a cloud in the sky. Goddamn I’m gonna miss this California weather.

I’ve done well not to be too inebriated these past few nights. I want to be clear headed as I step to the edge of the precipice. I want to see it happen. Feel it happen. The grandness of it, the simpleness, the powerful silence that ends a long hug. I want the elation. I want the heartache.

Last night was my last night here. Funny, I ended up with my best friends and a dart board, just like last time I left. I’m not upset that I missed a farewell visit to the abandoned building. It’s hard to say goodbye to something that’s not even supposed to exist. I met a few new amazing people, then wished them best of luck with the rest of their lives. My friends wished me the same. Last call. Last call at the Fox & Goose.

Good morning, Sacramento.

After this, it’s a night in the heated pools of Kenwood Spa in Santa Rosa. A trip to the Japanese Consulate in San Francisco. An overnight stay at Harbin Hot Springs. A drive to Auburn for Christmas with Mom and company. A journey to Redwood City to visit with dad’s side of the family. A train ride north to San Francisco to stay at Heather’s. A day in the city. A birthday party for someone I’ve never met. A night on the couch of a stranger. Then, on the 29th, a two-day voyage to the Philippines.

I saw Nikki last night on Skype. My last night here, she was exactly who I wanted to see before I went to bed. She’s the inspiration for all of this and I’m terribly in love.

So fare thee well, Sacramento. It’s time for me to go.

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